Dear Ladies,

Be careful who and what you allow to be your #goals. Be careful whose life you make your #goals. Be careful whose relationship is your #relationshipgoals. Be careful whose body are your #goals. Be careful who you chose to be your role model.

People can be amazing actors, and with the heavy social media presence in our everyday lives, it has become even easier to put on a facade. Let take that girl from high school who just posted her boyfriend for man crush Monday, saying that he is her everything. If you were still close with her you might know that he is actually everything that is holding her back from where she wants to be. That group of friends who keep posting their #squad pictures actually talk about each other behind each other’s backs. Just because you see a pair of best friends who always seem to be having a good time, it doesn’t mean that they should be your friendship goals. You don’t know their past and you don’t know what they hide from each other, you don’t know how much they gossip about each other,  so how can they really be your goals?

Things are not always as they seem or as people choose to portray them. We only want people to see the highlight reels of our life. We omit the bloopers (ie. the mistakes and the moments when we cast the wrong people to play a key role). Sometimes the grass only looks greener on the other side because that grass is plastic…that grass is fake. And this is just speculation, but my guess is that the soil is probably too rotten for real grass to prosper there. In other words, a person can be too hurt and angry to participate in healthy relationships. Instead of owning this and working towards a better mental state, they choose to portray a blissful lifestyle that you will applaud them for.

Bottom Line: Be careful of the things that you desire and the lives that you choose to follow. We have to focus more on having #goals that come from our heart and from what others choose to portray. I have learned not to make any specific couple my relationship goals, because my relationship goals should be achievable goals that allow my relationship to grown without changing who I am just to mimic someone else.